2025: The Initiations I Did & Didn't Ask For

Here we are again at the end of another calendar year! And as I look back at this difficult and amazing year, I remember that it began with two initiations. One, I desperately wanted. And the second was a complete surprise, filled with obstacles, and still isn't over. I set an intention at the beginning of 2025 to initiate. What I got was so much more complicated than anything I could've imagined!

Let's start with the one I asked for, dreamt about, and craved: the Tantra initiation! For years I've been studying, practicing, and teaching Neo Tantra, the Westernized version of the ancient Tantra practices. But I yearned to find a Guru to learn under, and to belong to a thousands of years-old lineage. I finally found her, and decided to initiate. Her name is Anusha.

This was a long process to actually begin. I was afraid, I was nervous, I felt like I might fail. So, I wanted it to be perfect. I wanted to start in January, not have any trips planned, and to stay home until it was complete. I needed about an hour a day to practice, and if I missed a day, I had to start all the way back at the beginning. I was determined to not fail.

It took 45 days to complete the initiation, and I learned how resilient I was. I completed it in the first shot! In 2025, I became an initiated sadhika or yogini (student) of the Sri Vidya Tantra lineage. But the journey doesn't end there. After a 45-day break, I began (and am still doing) the first round of practices. This is about an hour a day of sadhana (daily intentional practice).

The practices changed every 2-4 weeks this year with the exception of the final practice, which is about 6 months. I'm about halfway through this one, and again, if I miss a day, I have to go all the way back to the beginning. I will not miss one. This has been one of the greatest challenges of the year.

Unlike my initiation, where I intentionally didn't leave the house or take any trips, I couldn't continue that for the year. And we did a LOT this year! France for 9 days, Shambhala music festival in Canada for 8 days, Burning Man for 12 days, Denver immediately after that for 5 days, teaching at Cascade Equinox festival for 4 days, Christmas in Buffalo for 8 days. Plus, so many workshops, overnight events, van trips, and more! It was wild, and through it all I kept my promise.

This year I truly learned what it means to be in sadhana, to be in daily devotional practice to the Goddess. And I intend to continue this journey with her. I learned this year what it means to be a beginner. I learned to relax my expectations and stop pushing. She comes when she is ready. I learned what discernment truly is, how sensation plays an essential role, and what trickster energy does. I learned that what's truly worth it takes precious time and dedication. And that I am resilient as fuck through it all.

In 2025 I also got an unexpected initiation. After years of painful bleeds, low energy, ever increasing weight despite eating well and exercising, and BV I finally decided to see someone. Through my work with a holistic nutritionist and a naturopath, I discovered that I have high estrogen and low progesterone. These were causing liver issues, which in turn causes thyroid issues. This led directly to insulin resistance, which causes me to gain weight no matter what I do.

It's been very frustrating this year as I've gained almost 40 pounds even though I've been doubling down on weight lifting, eating enough fiber and protein, and walking so much more. I think I might have hit it too hard and increased my fiber and protein too quickly, which really strained my insulin system. It's disheartening, but I've also learned so much about my body in the process.

Last month I was talking to my Mom and complaining about how I barely had any clothes to wear, and just was feeling super down. She suggested I buy some new ones. I wallowed deeper and said that they probably wouldn't fit in a month because I'll either gain more weight or finally start losing it. I felt lost and hopeless and ugly. She told me that didn't matter, that no matter my weight I deserved to feel cute and fun. She sent me some money and said I could only spend it on clothes.

I begrudgingly listened to her, and got some new clothes and it was wild how quickly I felt better. I ended up donating a bunch of clothes that just made me sad, and cleared out some energy in my closet to feel better no matter where I'm at. I've sort of always fluctuated weights my whole life (probably a sign of hormone issues dating way back) and it was nice to listen to my Mom's advice for once and feel better. Here's your sign to not forget how important it is to feel good in your own clothes!

And the final initiation of 2025 was also huge! This year I decided to make the leap into joining a business mastermind! I got my degree in business, but this stuff all changes so rapidly. I was doing everything on my own, and I knew this year I wanted to make a big leap in the business. This was also the first year that I've fully supported myself completely on my business!

And it wasn't cheap! I spent more on this business mastermind than I made in sales the previous year! So, it was all or nothing for me! I joined Shoshana Ravens mastermind, and one of the greatest things about it is that it's designed for feminine business. That means instead of cold calls, hardcore business plans, and ads being the driver of success it's about magnetism, sustainable growth, messaging, and flow.

I love what she teaches, and the sheer leap of faith it took to join has catapulted me into 2025 doing 2.5x what I did last year. In sales, I did just shy of 50K this year, which is more than my first job paid out of college! I'm planning to at least 2.5x that again next year, and really create a sustainable business for me to fly into the future with!

In 2025, I also revamped my private workshops, taking them from whoa to WOW by adding a 2-hour coaching session that helps me build a completely custom 4-hour workshop, then added a 1-hour integration call after. This was one of my most successful transformations this past year, and I'm so freaking excited to keep offering it! The work I've done with people in these sessions has been incredible!

I've got a lot on the horizon and am so excited to dive in this January! First, I'm redoing my website (again) to capture the true expansiveness of my work: the Bliss Revolution! Next, I'm planning to redesign my workshops to take them into true, lasting transformation! Think: day retreats meet weekly group coaching! And finally, I'm going to be rethinking the Temple of Bliss. It was a project I tried this year, and sometimes you have to tear something apart to put it back together better! I'm so proud of myself for taking leaps in my business, and I know deeply that mistakes are all a part of the process. I'm not afraid to stop things that aren't working in the ways I wanted them to, so that I can make space for the next evolution!

Thank you from the bottom of my heart to all the people who bought coaching packages, workshops, and the Temple of Bliss from me this year. Thank you to those who read my blogs and watched my Instagram videos! Thank you to those who supported me through the ups and downs of my business, especially my Sweet Potato, the love of my life, and my forever partner. Our relationships has grown so much in the past year as you've loved every inch of my body through its transitions and kept doing the hard work yourself so we can love each other into oblivion!

To many more years with him, and with all of you, as we learn that bliss is our birthright, that pleasure awakens passion, and that love is worth all the heartache to get there! I love you, I trust you, I am with you.

Love,

Lona