What do I mean by sexual liberation? One of the most powerful tools of the Patriarchy was to disconnect people (especially women) from their own sexuality. Sexual liberty and autonomy was powerful in individual lives. And to take it away and replace it with shame, guilt, judgement, and purity culture was effective in taking away people's power because the patterns someone has in their most intimate, vulnerable moments of their sex lives are the same patterns that are repeated in the rest of their lives. If you can't receive in sex, then you can't receive in life. If you are ashamed of your sex, then you'll generally be ashamed in the rest of your life. So taking away sexual liberation was the same as taking away their liberation. That's why I focus on sex, love, and relationships in my coaching. Because the patterns you play out in sex are the same patterns you'll play out in the rest of your life. It's the easiest pathway to find your blocks to your liberation. Here's how the tools of Tantra, including breath, movement, sound, mindfulness, and energy can help liberate you!
Breath alone is one of the most powerful tools you have available to you! It might seem like it isn't very powerful because we do it all the time, but intentional breathwork is liberating! I realized this after I read an amazing book called "Breath" by James Nestor. He purported that because we aren't breathing intentionally anymore there are tons of health problems modern humans are facing, including sinus issues, oxygenation issues, huge sleep problems, and that our literal bone structure is changing due to our mouth breathing. Tantra (and spirituality in general) has known the benefits of intentional breath for thousands of years! It can quite literally unstick any stuck emotions in your body. And when you're trying to get sexually liberated, you're going to need to unstick every emotion, pattern, and conditioning that you have. This is the path to liberation. I'll give a practice at the end of this post that combines all five of these tools into a powerful sexual liberation practice!
Movement is the next tool on the chopping block. And you probably know all the benefits of moving yourself from the expansive fitness industry. But, did you know that movement can liberate your energy? Let's say we do a really epic breathwork session and we unstick a ton of stuck energy. Yay! Breath alone is not enough to liberate it from your body, too. Movement in combination with breath or after breathwork is the most liberating. Picture an ice tray with solid ice in it, and you want to get the water out. The water is like your stuck emotions. So, you take it out of the freezer and let it melt. Melting is like just doing breathwork. Now it's in a more moveable state, but without the movement of dumping the water, the stuck emotions will stay around even though they're so ready to move! Dump the water (stuck emotions) by moving the body.
Sound is one of my favorite ways to liberate myself. Just like movement, sound can liberate the stuck emotions that are ready to move. Using sound and movement together is an even more powerful tool. Your chakras are all uniquely designed to intake and outake energy in different ways. The root chakra can easily take in energy from the Earth below. The crown can take in energy easily from above. The heart can alchemize and transform energies and move them in and out. But the throat chakra is totally different. It is one of the most powerful exits from the body for energy to take in the form of sound. So, when something just feels like it needs to come out right now, you'll often yell, scream, moan in pleasure, or sing. These are theapeutic methods for dealing with emotions, and it all comes down to the throat chakra letting go of that energy through sound.
Energywork is maybe the most fun way to liberation. You can use breath, movement, and sound to liberate stuck energy and let it go. But there's also another path. You can liberate the energy with breath, movement, and sound then cycle it through your system and transmute it into something else you can use. Every energy, no matter how "dark" it might seem can be transformed and used for even more liberation. The microcosmic orbit is an energy technique that moves your energy from your root to your crown up your back and then back down your front. It takes the energy through every chakra, and each chakra has it's own transmuting powers. By simply moving the energy through each chakra you can transform it into pleasure, activity, aliveness, healing, protecting, and so much more. So, you can liberate the stuck energy that is blocking your sexual liberation and get rid of it, or you can liberate it and use it to power you life. Imagine how freeing it would feel to liberate an old sad trauma wound into pleasure that heals your womb! Spoiler... it feels amazing!
Mindfulness is the last piece I'll talk about and it's especially important. Mindfulness is about meditation, yes. But it's beyond that. Meditation is a tool to focus the mind, but what you do with that focused mind is the power. So, let's say you sign up for a 5 hour breathwork journey. You're excited about liberation! Then you show up and your mind is all over the place, you can't focus on the breath, you can't focus on relaxing, you can't even tune out of the constant stream of thoughts there. This 5 hour breathwork can be useless if you can't focus the mind. It's important to note that breath, movement, and sound, and energy can all help you get better focus just by doing them, so they play off each other very well. But there's certainly a deeper place you can get to if you practice focusing the mind. Sometimes the mind is so powerful that it will keep these stuck conditionings in place even with the other tools. The mind can play incredible tricks on you. Regular meditation and focusing practices can help you relax the pace of the mind so that it allows the liberation to happen.
Ready for a practice in sexual liberation?! First, don't try this if you're pregnant, have breathing or heart problems, or don't feel safe. Find a private place to do this so you can really let loose. And understand that if you feel lightheaded, tingly in your hands, feet, or face, that's totally normal. I recommend doing this practice on soft ground, so if the worst case happens and you fall over, you're still safe. You can do this practice anytime you feel stuck emotions and you want to liberate them, or you can just do it anytime you want to.
We're going to combine all 5 of these tools into a powerful practice. You'll use open mouth connected breath the whole time. That means you relax your jaw open and breathe through the mouth. You want a heavy, faster than average breath. Don't hold tension in the jaw, and relax the shoulders, belly, and hips. Find a position that is comfortable to start in. It could be lying on your back or on all fours. You could stand, but be careful not to fall over if you get lightheaded! If you want to have someone you trust there with you this can help a lot to keep you safe and to help coach you to keep going! You could even do this process for them afterwards.
If you ever get overwhelmed, don't push harder. If old memories won't leave you alone during the practice or flashbacks come up then stop the breath and find your safe place inside. Try finding your safe place before the practice so you can get familiar. Find a place in your body that nothing else can touch, a place that only you know about. Then picture what it looks like, sounds like, smells like, feels like, and tastes like. Mine is a lovely field of flowers with all my favorite things that lives deep in my heart. My Goddess is there and she can soothe me. Return to this space whenever you need it. Healing is just as much about safety as it is about liberation. Remember that.
So, choose your position on the floor and start the breath. Take a minute or two to get comfortable with the breath. It might be strange at first. Know that the mind will most certainly try to get you to stop. It doesn't like what it can't predict and it can't predict anything when it comes to breathwork. This is where the mindfulness comes in. Keep returning your attention to the breath over and over no matter what thoughts come up to try and stop you. Then, once you're more attuned to the breath start to tune into the body and notice what movement and sound wants to come out. You don't have to force it, but feel free to explore. If you're on your back try shaking it out. If you're on all fours try arching and bending your back. Do whatever feel natural, and sometimes stillness and quiet will feel natural. No matter what the movement and sound are doing keep breathing!
I would do this for at least 5 minutes, or up to 30 minutes for experienced practitioners. Breath, movement, sound, mindfulness. At the end we add the energy. You'll move into stillness lying down and you can let the rest of the instructions go. Then you'll do the microcosmic orbit. You'll inhale and with your attention you'll move the energy from your root up the back of you body to your crown, then on an exhale move it back down the front body to the root. The most important thing to remember is that where attention goes energy flows. So, if you're new to this just trust a little bit. Your body naturally does this process. Follow the line of the energy with your attention up and down the body several times. Enjoy it!
To complete the practice spend several minutes in silent stillness. Practicing mindfullness to focus on the sensations of the body. You're not trying to move or change them, just focusing your attention on any body sensations and allowing the universe to show you anything it wants. Remember safety and returning to your safe space. You could also have a friend on speed dial that you can call if you need support. This process can be extremely emotional! I've cried many times in it. The tears were healing most of the time, but sometimes I need extra support. Don't have any big plans after this process. Give yourself lots of rest and integration. Journal about the process if you like. Then let me know how it went for you! I love to hear about your journeys!
And if you want to go deeper and be lead in practices like this then join my coaching list! I guide people through processes like this to help you find your sexual liberation so that you can have whole life liberation! Discover who you are beyond your past pain and conditionining so that you can live in your authentic pleasure, overflowing bliss, and become an epic lover! Send your email to LonaGarner@gmail.com to be added to my coaching list!
INSPIRED ACTION: What is making you feel resistant to this practice? Notice that! Your conditioning is probably in full swing just reading this practice. Try it anyway.